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one birdy and a little guy and a bad mousie and a LION
boom shacka locka : http://pulse.martini.nu/
get off my lawn 
27th-Oct-2003 03:54 pm
I turned 27 yesterday, and in the tradition of getting older, I’m going to take this opportunity to complain about how things are ‘nowadays’. The subject matter: toys.

First off, GIJoe. These are ancient action figures (1960’s), and they used to be really large. They made a huge comeback when I was little, probably due to the fact that they had the sense to size them much smaller (so boys didn’t feel like they were playing with dolls), moved away from the straight up army stuff, and made some interesting characters with wacky and unique abilities. Zartan was a glow in the dark master of disguise, Snake Eyes was mysterious, and Destro was just a bad ass with an unexplained metal noggin. They produced new characters that coincided with the plotline of the cartoon, and the women characters had strong roles. All in all, good stuff. On my last visit to a toy store, they had a selection of original, large GIJoe characters. These were recreations of the originals, their purpose completely escaping me. Collectors don’t care, since new stuff isn’t worth squat - and kids don’t care, because by today’s standards, these toys are seriously, seriously lame. Boys don’t want to play with dayglo orange vest wearing Ken dolls.

Item 2: Transformers. These used to be beefy metal, almost all of them transforming uniquely from each other. They seem to be mass producing 5 different types now - when they want to sell another character, they change the plastic color and give it a different name. They are brain dead easy to transform, and are lacking in nearly every way possible when compared to their 20 year old counterparts. The worst thing ever: They gave a new transformer the name ‘GrimLock’, some shit ass bulldozer or something. Grimlock was originally the t-rex of the dinobots. How dare they crap upon my childhood like this?

Item 3: Masters of the Universe.
I’m not even going to go into this right now.

Even more of a bummer is thinking about things to come... there are entire generations of kids that grew up on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Power Rangers, and Pokemon. They will eventually grow old enough to make movies. You think the Hulk was bad? Just wait.
27th-Oct-2003 04:58 pm (UTC) - ...
Happy late birthday.
28th-Oct-2003 01:21 am (UTC)
It could just be that I'm easily amused, but I thought this site was a great trip of GI JOE nostalgia for a minute or two =D

28th-Oct-2003 11:13 am (UTC)
TMNT > *
28th-Oct-2003 08:20 pm (UTC)
Well said. :)
29th-Oct-2003 02:09 am (UTC)
happy belated
29th-Oct-2003 04:53 am (UTC)
I got my son a megatron for his birthday last year. The megatron I remember was a freaking gun, this was some kind of insect/army tank. And megatron had a deep comanding voice, and when you pull the canon back on this thing, it goes, "decepticons attack" in some voice that resemebles maybe, the voice of an oompa loompa who has inhaled some helium.
I feel your pain, and yeah, I have only seen the Masters of the Universe toys packages, but it looks like now its "Masters of the 'Jungle?' Universe"
And as far as GI Joe, I bought my son Zartan last week. (btw he is three and seems to love it) and it doesn't glow or anything special really. He still has his racoon eyes, but what I thought peculiar is his gun is some kind of modified chainsaw/laser? hybrid.

29th-Oct-2003 04:56 am (UTC) - ps...
three more years till we hit the big 30......im gonna go to a dark corner and hide...lol....I see your a scorpio too....

29th-Oct-2003 05:37 am (UTC)
Did you ever see "The Masters of the Universe" movie? It was not that bad. It even had Dolph Lundgren in it!
29th-Oct-2003 09:43 am (UTC)
Also had one of Courtney Cox's first movie appearances, Robert McNeil (Tom Paris on ST: Voyager), and Billy Barty, who just plain rules. I'm sure they look back... uh... fondly on that one. (Ok, I admit it. I loved that movie.)

And of course, there already was a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie also... but things go in cycles. It will be back 10 - 15 years from now, worse than ever. (Punisher, anyone?)
29th-Oct-2003 11:07 am (UTC)
I know how you feel.

I am young, but when I was a kid, I was playing with barbies (more or less ripping off their limbs and burning their hair with matches I found lying around the house), not electric dolls that say "clothes are cool!"

Toys now leave no room for creativity. The next generation is fucked. Lacking in abstract thinking, or even thinking for themselves, these kids are gonna have it rough.
30th-Oct-2003 01:57 pm (UTC)
Au contraire, children do not have it rough. I'm relatively young too, being eighteen, but I don't think the same way.

A toy that has all the bells and whistles still isn't a toy unless it is used as one.

I know I watch my little cousins playing with their toys, and really, it is exactly the same as how I played with my bells and whistle-less toys. They invent a storyline, other characters and play through it with their toys as the characters. Or they go outside and play with a ball, or read.

Really, the only way that the next generation is going to lack in abstract thinking is if they are prevented from these activities.

Of course, there are the PlayStations and XBoxes, but then, I had the Sega and Nintendo. And before that there was the Amiga and Commodore 64, so how is that any different?
30th-Oct-2003 04:06 pm (UTC)
I don't know, I just feel like some of these toys are doing the playing for the kids. Sure, they're going to have to make up storylines and such, but not near as much as they used to. Barbie talks now. You don't make her say whatever you want. trucks go on their own and you don't have to push them across the carpet.
I just liked the old, plastic and cloth toys I guess.
30th-Oct-2003 04:18 pm (UTC)
Ah, I see your point. It's a good one.

Btw, hello mahlon.
30th-Oct-2003 05:06 pm (UTC) - Joining the rant on Transformers
No kidding! I'm only 19 and I remember those old transformers... Optumis Prime was dye-cast metal ... you could beat your buddies to death with him before he came apart. The new generation of transformers are pathetic. I wish they would do us all a favor and go old school all over again. that would spark interest in old fans as well as new kids.

~rant mode off~
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